Contentment consists not in adding more fuel, but in taking away some fire.– [Thomas Fuller]
taking these headphones back too. argh. i want really good, awesome headphones, but i’m realizing until i spend the money, that ain’t gonna happen.
i think my headphone search is over. lordy. i think i’ve returned 4 pairs. : ) PICKY. PICKY. In other news, I stick with my original opinion that mowing the yard blows.
a typical day in my life
today i… dressed/fed easy e and packed 2 lunches. took e to daycare. went to work. came home. make dinner for me and e. cleaned and mopped kitchen. started a load of laundry. mowed front and back yard. read books to e/put him to bed.
a blog post worth sharing
http://mightygirl.com/2012/07/05/divorce-field-guide-best-advice/ My sis sent me this and I really enjoyed this gal’s perspective.
call me laura ingalls
we had no power last night starting about 6 pm but it was not that big of a deal. we went to the gym and then home, but still no power. promptly went to target! just found flashlights and e slept with one. he does not like candles! the whole fire thing? who knows? now i know. i enjoyed reading by candlelight. it was kind of lovely to go to bed early and once my iphone died, it was nice to...
I am not in control. My crystal ball? Gone, shattered to shit. Embrace the “delicious ambiguity,” girlfriend.
Some stories don’t have a clear beginning, middle and end. Life is about not...– Gilda Radner
it’s may 10th. how did this happen? around a year ago, my world was totally turned upside down. little did i know but this event was the best thing that could have happened to me. i feel right-side-up now. : )
finally had my run-in with the super cute boy that sits on the other side of the building enroute to the coffee machine. i’ve been noticing his public radio coffee mug for months. yum. but, really, who cares? i don’t have time to date. it’s spring! it’s my favorite time of year. it’s just too hard to orchestrate baby sitters, etc. plus, who needs a boyfriend when my...
i like the boys with the canoes.
ok. it is official. i am too old to go to shows at the orange peel. i had not been there since maybe 2003. the sound wasn’t as great as i remember. i was annoyed at waiting in line for the bathroom. the beer was expensive. i had beer spilled down my back and ultimate annoyance was the doors were swung open on the side of the room where smokers are allowed to go out. so it smelled like smoke....
and…it has started. i’m just not into wasting my time/someone else’s time. i can’t do it. i think about terry. i think about gary. even scott. about what i know about myself. i must rely on my gut. so many times i did not and i would like to think that i learned something from those experiences. time. age. those things have taught me a few things. today, i had a moment. a...
i really like hot tubs. that’s all i am going to say about that…
taxes. boo hiss. clean off desk (find desktop)
i can’t keep up with my virtual love life! ha ha. jeezy pete. i think i hate dating. what happened to the telephone? i sucked at dating before and i still suck at it.
still battling pink robots. still kicking pink robot ass.
not a good start...
to my kid-free weekend. scott is such an idiot. jeezy pete. i don’t think i can turn up my music loud enough today to drown out all the negative thoughts, memories, rage. argh. can i just say that i really don’t like seeing his car. with it’s pa license plate? asshole. i miss that car. i can’t look at the reserved parking spaces for hybrid/fuel eff. cars here at work...
a date. i have a date saturday. here goes nothing.
These are the soul’s changes. I don’t believe in aging. I believe in...– Virginia Woolf
to the dude who keeps talking to me at the Y and tonight came and sat by me when i was watching e play basketball: stop. please. i don’t want to have to break your heart.
reveal/unveil--stalker #1 on facebook
is 43 too old for me? do i like blue-eyed dudes? that’s a departure for me. pisces. ugh. history of those. how did i get to be 35? really? i’m that old already?
funny thing i saw today
The best one: Never wear glasses on a date; your potential mate will think you are undesirably smarthttp://www.theonion.com/articles/fashion-dos-donts,8104/
it’s almost surreal how calm i feel about it. i guess i am at peace with it all. i fought hard, i did everything i could. i stand behind every crazy-ass decision i made. i wouldn’t do anything differently and i have no regrets. it wasn’t what i wanted but it’s what i got. c’est la vie.
apparently i must endure some crappy pop songs during zumba for those one or two gems that i hear. example: bruno mars, that really horrible “moves like jagger” number and whatever christina aguilera song she played last night. bleh. what makes it worse is that i think this woman is using her own choreography and she kinda sucks, not that i could do better… what i love:...
movies that i am pissed scott took
being john malkevich the usual suspects all of the wes anderson films eternal sunshine of the spotless mind oceans 11, 12 & 13 i just now realized that my movie collection is like a third of what it once was. asshole.
i was a really, really awesome wife. i liked being married.
i have found/done so many things in the last 8 months that alert me to the fact(s) that maybe i lost a little bit of myself during my relationship with scott swan. examples: i am back to listening to music really loud in my house (scott hated loud music and was always bitching.) i am buying music again and making it more of a priority…just like i did a long, long time ago. i found some...
i am done with bullshit parenting classes! yah. my mom is done babysitting. when i picked elliott up last night, he was already in his pjs. i thought, “yah!” well, i could not get this child to sleep and i guess about 10:30 he finally fell asleep. you do not put coke in a sippy cup. what is wrong with you? really? fabulous. i did not know he was drinking coke until i poured out his...
muddy floors, piles of laundry
my house is disgusting, where is that maid i asked santa for? wtf? i only asked for one thing this year! i just cleaned last weekend. looking forward to handing off roscoe to scott when he moves back this summer. he is a pain in my ass. and he sheds and tracks mud through my mopped kitchen.
who is manning my netflix queue? jeez. i need to not get anything else with subtitles. at this moment in time, i can’t be bothered to read my movies after getting e to sleep. in related problems, i am never going to figure out what channels i have and what ones i do not. it makes no sense that i can watch something, like portlandia, on demand but i don’t have the channel ifc. plus, my...
wait. good sign or bad omen?
feb. 2 is groundhog day.
Got rid of the dude who was texting me a lot and messaging me on Facebook. Yah! I was worried I was going to have to just be my blunt, ‘special’ self but I didn’t even have to be mean. I seriously do not enjoy being pursued electronically. Hiding behind the phone, computer, whatever, is lame in my book. I think that is also why internet-dating just doesn’t appeal to me. I...
Trust your instinct to the end, though you can render no reason.– Ralph Waldo Emerson
wow. these people sure made crappy choices when they decided to bring children into the world with their ex-spouses. they all have the worst stories. i sit there and think, “wow.” then i think about my own situation. guess i shouldn’t be talking. these classes, for the most part, are a ridiculous waste. in summation, these folks generally should have been forced to take these...
Common sense is instinct. Enough of it is genius.– George Bernard Shaw
stuck in mud
it is unreal how disorganized my house is at present. this goes against my nature. i looked at the christmas tree last night and sat down on the couch and watch an episode of portlandia instead. i don’t think i have ever left it up this long into the new year. i did unpack all of e’s bags and my bags and do 2 loads of laundry. tonight’s mission is the grocery store. my life is...
Things I can't believe I ate on my trip
Ande and Dan certainly eat a lot fancier than this picky eater. I did pretty good though. Over the last few days I ate: Tripe (Totally gross, never again!) Chicken livers (Weird, not my cup of tea.) Duck (Mmmmmm. Nah. Didn’t hate it.) Sardines (Super fishy. Can’t overcome childhood formed ideas of sardines in tin cans being gross AND for Popeye the Sailor.) I can’t even...
throwing things away
i have been actually getting rid of stuff over the last few months. however, last night i put all these real simple and budget living magazines out on the porch in a cardboard box and this morning i found myself flipping through an issue and pangs of remorse plagued me! i can do it. i don’t need these things. they just take up space. right? plus, they are heavy. *did i mention that these...
It does not matter how slow you go so long as you do not stop.– Wisdom of Confucius
this season of dexter is totally disappointing. really? colin hanks? you kinda suck as an actor buddy. i don’t care who your daddy is. i also strangely miss lumen. i liked her and dexter together. i have a huge crush on dexter morgan. oh where oh where can my paper cutter be? dear june jessie, where did you put it? dear september jessie, did you unpack it honey? i really don’t want to...
christmas tree mishaps
i lost 4 (maybe more, i had to stop counting) glass ornaments yesterday while decorating the tree. elliott was a big help. he got really into it and was happy. i told him to let mommy do the glass ones and he said, “but i like glass.” hmmm. yes, he does. i will have to upload the pics.
those boys sure made me happy! i kind hope elliott plays an instrument. did my dad play the trumpet? why i am thinking that? did i see a trumpet case somewhere? maybe grandpa had one. i know scott’s dad was a trumpet player in his past life. i wonder if he still has it.
kim: “how did you get it inside?” [meaning the 7 ft Christmas tree] jessica: “what do you mean? i carried the damn thing in!” it is amazing what you don’t need husbands for…
that sucked. you have no right to take my joy. i don’t wantcha anymore….you stole my joy. you took my joy and i want it back. [lucinda williams] jesus christ. ...
police are the same everywhere
ok. i am creeped out. i ate a lovely sushi meal and on the wy back to the hotel, decided i would walk along the shore. it was beautiful. i came up on a beach outlet and decided to go ahead and head back to my hilarious casino hotel. hmm. there was a police van heading down the street when i came up and i saw it but just went ahead trying to get the sand off my feet and put my high heels back on....